gong hay fat choy
GUESS WHAT I AM IN THE BATHROOM AT ASIAN TOP BUFFET
IF I LOOK FRIGHTENED THERE IS REASON FOR THAT
THE DOOR DID NOT OPEN VERY EASILY ON MY WAY IN HERE
I AM AFEARED THAT IT WILL FAIL ENTIRELY ON MY WAY OUT AND I WILL BE TRAPPED HERE
I couldn’t bear to shoot a Benjamin Franklin pooptrait in a modern day bathroom so I took that mess outside.
so, pictured here is Benjamin Franklin pooping in his back yard in Philadelphia, reading the publication of a colleague.
Night before last’s pooptrait at a barnes and noble
warning pooptrait: DO NOT GO SEE IMMORTALS
DO NOT SEE IMMORTALS
DO NOT
SEE IMMORTALS
IT IS THE SINGLE WORST MOVIE EVER
I AM SO SORRY GREEK CULTURE
TRULY AWFUL FILM.
cinematic garbage. simply fucking bad as hell oh my god I cannot believe I spent 10 dollars to see that fuckery
This pooptrait Which is I dunno something like 24 will account for the undeniable gut fuckery I am enduring whilst typing this.
this was taken earlier today at a dunkin donuts (from which I ate 4 donuts, which then sat upon 3 fish tacos from about an hour prior) men’s restroom. I was about to enter the women’s bathroom when I heard a horrible sound like a buzzsaw coming from inside. needless to say, I promptly turned around straight into an adjacent bathroom.
why does this urinal look so small?
secret late-night marmite runs
halloween party recovery alan alda poooptrait
and I don’t even KNOW the number of this one anymore
pooptrait bb gsa halloween party edition
betsy has a karaoke machine in her bafroom
pooptrait 25
Anonymous asked: Personally, I think your pooptraits are the best. Which is your favorite so far?
WOO anon you are so wonderful to give me these sweet little askbox gifts I reckon I should send you a thank-you note with a cat tied to a balloon on it.
This is my favorite: 
The lines in this one are really great as far as compositon goes. But what makes it my favorite is the juxtaposition of my facial expression and the shopped taco and the cat face. For some reason it just appeals to me in every way.
A close second though, is this one:
It’s so expressive and totally and perfectly captured what I was feeling, and has just a hint of bad-phone-picture shoddiness that makes it so personal.
I talk about these things like works of art, which they kind of sort of maybe a little bit are. I started out doing them searching for an identity, like “I’m gonna be the lady that takes picz on the crapper” and in some way I got that, but I also got a weird, uncomfortable new way to introduce stories and express emotion and that’s what I appreciate most about them.
That and they’re fuckin’ funny.
Me, über-confused about the gum stuck to the bathroom stall.
also don’t mind my baby hands.
OF YOU THINK ABOUT THEM YOU WILL BECOME UPSET
STOP IT
POOPTRAIT24
sdrawkcab tiartpoop
HA HA I AM SO CLEVR LOOK I SPELLED POOPTRAIT BACKWARDS
AND I SPELLED BACKWARDS BACKWARDS
HA HAAAAA
numero 22
all hyped up on pumpkin spice latte and sugar in the raw packets in the men’s restroom in a starbucks, talkin’ the night away
pooptrait # 19, post-party pooptrait.
everything hurts.
it’s like I’m hungover but from junk food and dancing.
School Pooptrait
It was “spirit day” today.
they meant school spirit, like pep.
BUT OH I TAUGHT THEM TO USE AMBIGUOUS WORDS. MMMHMMM
motherfucking success pooptrait
oh god I’m so tired
Edit: Pooptrait #17, Dragon Stadium, after a night of “working it”. Note: I’m still tired.